Black and White thinking and more.

February 8, 2010 | 28 Comments

I recently posted a blog called The Ten Signs You Are A Bad Parent. Some overly sensitive folks, perhaps those with a bit of a guilty conscience, attacked my ideas with a vengeance! Some of you pointed out how you let your kid have a television in their bedroom and the kid still got straight A’s at school. Good for you! Some argued you often don’t know where your kid is and don’t need to because you have a great kid you can completely trust. Good for you again! Some of you even argued that it wasn’t necessary to be the kind of person you wanted your child to become. Seriously? Okay then, good for you one more time!

Do what you want to do and let your kid do exactly as they please. Go ahead and roll the dice with your child’s future. If that is your stance on responsible parenting, then get after it. Let’s see how that works out for you when your 25 year old wants to move back into their old bedroom because they can’t make it in the real world. When your kid can’t get through your front door because they are wider than the doorframe. When your little princess can’t pay her bills because she never learned how to be responsible enough to even show up to work on time. When your teen is charged as a sex offender for sexting, or shows up pregnant or with an STD. Or when they excitedly call and brag that they are about to be on a reality television show! Won’t you be proud then? When those or any number of other things happen, maybe then you will look at my list and think again about good parenting and bad parenting.

Before any of you blow a gasket, all of those things can still happen regardless of what you’ve done. I get it. I covered that whole concept in Your Kids Are Your Own Fault: A Guide For Raising Responsible, Productive Adults. I know that sometimes, you can do everything right and it all still goes wrong. Not often, but sometimes. So don’t write me and say, “yeah but . . . “ I get it. Move along. And for those of you who have written me saying I wish I had taken a stance with my kid earlier because now they are teenagers and I can’t get back in control. I get that too. I wish you had as well. But it’s not too late. You can still re-establish communications and make things better. Maybe not perfect again, but better. And for all who have told me how my ideas have helped them with their kids, thank you especially!

Now on to my real point!

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