The Wheel That Doesn’t Squeak
May 16, 2010 | 20 Comments
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The Wheel That Doesn’t Squeak
Most people do the right thing. Most people work. Most people pay their bills. Most people do a pretty good job of raising their kids. Most folks are fairly kind and charitable and do the best they can with the information they have. As tough as I am on people, I believe that folks are basically good somewhere down deep in their hearts. They may do stupid things from time to time, but they are good folks at a core level. At least I hope so.
But there are no headlines for these folks. The headlines and the news stories go to the few, not the many. The attention goes to the few who make the most noise, the squeaky wheels of society. The squeaky wheel gets the grease and the grease is attention. And sadly attention only makes the wheel squeak louder and seems to create even more squeaky wheels.
Every group from the NRA to the Tea Party Movement to the women’s groups and gay and lesbian associations, churches, most professional associations and organizations, from animal rights to civil rights - right down to both the Republican and Democratic parties. All have extremist faction that steal the attention from the people in the middle that the organization was intended to represent. Every group.
Every business has policies that punish the many because of the stupid actions of the few. Very few people write bad checks or return stuff after it’s been used and on and on but businesses write policies that will effect the 97% in a negative way simply because the 3% is stupid.
Do we need more Job Stimulus or more WORKER stimulus?
March 7, 2010 | 49 Comments
Do we need more JOB stimulus or do we need more WORKER stimulus? (Or should I say NON-WORKER stimulus?)
I know there are 15M people out of work – but do they all have to be? There are hundreds of thousands of jobs available TODAY that can’t be filled. Why not? It seems to me that people are just too lazy to do the work. In fact, why should they work? Where is the incentive? We have extended unemployment benefits to the point that some people find it easier NOT to work than to actually take a job.
I just watched a Fox News report about a woman who had just stopped looking for work. When they asked her why she had stopped, she said, “Because there is nothing out there.” I call bullshit on that one. There just isn’t anything out there that suits this woman’s vision of herself. Get a clue Sweetheart, you aren’t too good to do anything that brings in a paycheck. Get over yourself.
I had a guy write me this week on my Facebook fan page (http://www.larrywinget.com/facebook.html) saying he had stopped looking for work as well. His comment was “ I am worth more than $10 an hour.” Really? If you are an able-bodied person sitting on your butt watching television and drawing unemployment or any other government assistance when there is a job you could take and yet you don’t take it, I will agree, you are not worth $10 an hour – you aren’t worth ANYTHING!!!! You are a loser! A lazy good for nothing loser.
Black and White thinking and more.
February 8, 2010 | 28 Comments
I recently posted a blog called The Ten Signs You Are A Bad Parent. Some overly sensitive folks, perhaps those with a bit of a guilty conscience, attacked my ideas with a vengeance! Some of you pointed out how you let your kid have a television in their bedroom and the kid still got straight A’s at school. Good for you! Some argued you often don’t know where your kid is and don’t need to because you have a great kid you can completely trust. Good for you again! Some of you even argued that it wasn’t necessary to be the kind of person you wanted your child to become. Seriously? Okay then, good for you one more time!
Do what you want to do and let your kid do exactly as they please. Go ahead and roll the dice with your child’s future. If that is your stance on responsible parenting, then get after it. Let’s see how that works out for you when your 25 year old wants to move back into their old bedroom because they can’t make it in the real world. When your kid can’t get through your front door because they are wider than the doorframe. When your little princess can’t pay her bills because she never learned how to be responsible enough to even show up to work on time. When your teen is charged as a sex offender for sexting, or shows up pregnant or with an STD. Or when they excitedly call and brag that they are about to be on a reality television show! Won’t you be proud then? When those or any number of other things happen, maybe then you will look at my list and think again about good parenting and bad parenting.
Before any of you blow a gasket, all of those things can still happen regardless of what you’ve done. I get it. I covered that whole concept in Your Kids Are Your Own Fault: A Guide For Raising Responsible, Productive Adults. I know that sometimes, you can do everything right and it all still goes wrong. Not often, but sometimes. So don’t write me and say, “yeah but . . . “ I get it. Move along. And for those of you who have written me saying I wish I had taken a stance with my kid earlier because now they are teenagers and I can’t get back in control. I get that too. I wish you had as well. But it’s not too late. You can still re-establish communications and make things better. Maybe not perfect again, but better. And for all who have told me how my ideas have helped them with their kids, thank you especially!
Now on to my real point!
Ten Signs You Are A Bad Parent
January 25, 2010 | 37 Comments
There are many signs that parents aren’t doing a good job as parents. All you have to do is look around at the millions of people living out the results of their own bad parenting to know that. Take a moment and look at these ten signs and evaluate how you are doing:
Ten Signs You Are A Bad Parent
If you don’t know where your child is right now,
you are a bad parent.
If your child is obese,
you are a bad parent.
If your child has a television in their bedroom,
you are a bad parent.
If you don’t know your child’s friends,
you are a bad parent.
If you tolerate disrespect from your child verbally or physically, you are a bad parent.
If you promise consequences for either good behavior or bad behavior and don’t deliver, you are a bad parent.
If you don’t teach your child about money,
you are a bad parent.
If you don’t have open, honest communication with your child about sex; the dangers, consequences and joy of it,
you are a bad parent.
If your grown child still lives at home and mooches off you,
you are a bad parent.
If your own life is an example of what you don’t want your child to grow up and become, you are a bad parent.
Some of you are now spewing and sputtering and shouting “yeah but” at me because your kids are great yet they have a TV in their room or are overweight or blah, blah, blah-de-blah-de-blah! Okay, you can tell yourself that, and since I don’t know you or your kid I’ll step back and give you the benefit of the doubt. But I still don’t believe you. Just because you don’t see the harmful results of your action or inaction today, doesn’t mean that you won’t later.
“But I genuinely LOVE my kids Larry!”
I’m sure you do. But we have to stop pretending that the definition of being a good parent is “loving your child.” Parenting is MORE than love. Parenting is loving your child enough to make sure you produce a responsible, productive fit adult who lives a life steeped in honesty, integrity and respect. An adult with a strong work ethic who knows how to give her word and keep it even when it isn’t convenient. A person who knows how to be financially responsible by earning, investing, saving, giving and enjoying their money. That requires communication, involvement, education, discipline and punishment. It requires work. Love without the actions to back it up doesn’t really mean much.
If you want proof about the damaging effects of these ten signs and more, read my book, Your Kids Are Your Own Fault: A Guide For Raising Responsible Productive Adults. Go to www.yourkidsareyourownfault.com
What’s REALLY important?
December 14, 2009 | 10 Comments
Seems like such as easy question to answer. The average, normal person would quickly say “my kids,” or “my family” or “being healthy” and so on. I bet those answers are about what you came up with when you first read the question too.
It’s just that I’m not buying those answers. I’m not calling anyone a liar who recites those quick and easy answers, it’s just that I don’t buy that’s what is really important to most people. Why would I say that? Because their isn’t too much proof to suggest those answers are the truth.
One of my basic philosophies is that your time, your energy and your money go to what is important to you. So if kids and family and being healthy was as important as most people say, it would follow that is where people would focus their time, energy and money. Follow? Well, it isn’t happening. Look around and you’ll see that people are clearly not putting their actions into the important things in life. People are putting their time, energy and money into lots of things but more often than not, it’s the temporary, the mundane, and the instantly gratifying. The ridiculous occupies people’s time, saps their energy and seduces the money from their fingers. And the media helps with that fascination. But I don’t blame the media because they only give us what we beg to see. It’s not their fault they are capitalizing on our preoccupation with the stupid; it’s our own. Watching stupid stuff on television is voluntary participation. No one forces you to sit there and see who the newest stupid celebrity is and what he/she is doing. You choose to do that. People choose to participate in things of no importance and neglect what is really important. I dealt in great detail about this problem in my book, The Idiot Factor: The Ten Ways We Sabotage Our Life, Money and Business (formerly titled People Are Idiots and I Can Prove It.)
Are there exceptions? Of course there are so don’t get all fired up and write me a bunch of comments about how wrong I am and how my premise doesn’t apply to you. Fine. You may be the exception. Read this and be satisfied with how none of this applies to you and find some satisfaction in pointing the finger of blame at everyone else.
“I get it, Larry. So what is important?”
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